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mom mom's mother
story
notes from mom about her mother, mabel spring
1999 mabel amazed me, more as i get older. she was
born in 1894, grew up in a large farm home, with 2
sisters and 3 brothers, a father we never heard
much about and a petite pretty mother hattie we
only knew as a gentle senile elder. mabel went to
country school, graduated and went on to tobin
college in fort dodge - that was the step out of
the rural community, and broadened one's education.
she studied latin, philosophy, history, was an
eager reader. a pretty, lively young woman she
played basketball on the first women's team in
iowa. as a friend, mabel was a winner - she had her
group of friends she kept all her life - one of the
advantages of living in the same area all your
life. the pictures show how the girls clowned
around - even as young women dressing up, posing,
picnicking, traveling to visit cousins all the way
to davenport, rock island, colorado and minnesota -
by train since there were no planes and roads
weren't very good. how much effort was involved -
the clothing which needed care - no drip dry
permanent press fabrics, hairdos for the long hair
- no short cut "bobs" until the 1920's. mabel was
so glad to cut her long heavy hear because it gave
her headaches from its weight - what freedom for
women in the 20's when fashions lightened up -
shorter dresses, simpler styles, smaller hats - and
the freedom that insued. issues - the right to
vote, prohibition, birth control campaign, real
careers for women. the 20's were exciting times -
electricity, cars, post war excitement, darwin vs.
religious fundamentalists - no wonder paul and
mabel became intellectuals - radio reached out to
the country. they had electricity by 1920 - as well
as plumbing in their remodeled, rebuilt home on the
farm. paul and mabel got the farm and john s. and
emma moved to gowrie, to a house right west of the
lutheran church. compare a new bride's task now - nothing
compared to what a young bride had to know then -
farming, butchering, canning, preserving, baking,
fire building, sewing, tending lamps and lanterns,
nursing the sick, all the while cleaning and
preparing 3 meals a day plus "lunches," caring for
animals, gardening, hitch the horses, saddle the
horse, then eventually add the pressures of child
bearing, nursing and caring for the babies and
children, teaching them the ways of life - the
telephone was available but who had time to enjoy
it - it was strictly an instrument of business -
and very little of that if you didn't want the
neighbors to know all yours. the mail was left 3/4 of a mile away at the
south corner so sometimes everyone was too busy to
get it during the day. mabel would take an evening
walk after the children were in bed and the work
was done to get the mail, and to have some quiet
time. as a young teacher she rode a horse to her
school 2 miles from where she boarded at the john
s. anderson farm. at the school of course, she had
to start the fire, clean, dust, teach, be alert to
health problems. she even scrubbed heads with
kerosene to kill head lice when parents didn't take
care of the problem. was glad zippers weren't
around - much harder than buttons! mind you doing
all this in high necked, long sleeved, floor length
dresses, with your long hair piled up on your head
- and then rode your horse home over mud, snow,
ice, dust, rain! now, to get this high class job as a country
school teacher, you went to what was called "normal
training." this was a year or two of schooling,
followed by a test that certified you to teach. if you married you ended your 'career' but then,
being a wife and mother was a full time job before
the advent of freezers and the various electrical
appliances. churning butter was done by the
children's muscle power cranking the wheel on the
churn, under mabel's supervision - in the kitchen
while she did her baking or other daily chores.
what else did i help with? washing the separator in
the milkhouse - not especially fun, but
independently done meant you were old enough for
the responsibility - i recall "keeping mabel
company" - i was the little kid left alone to tag
after mom - she taught me, let me help - then - i
got the job. how kids kept busy: of course hunting the eggs and feeding the
chickens and ducks was kid stuff - as soon as you
could carry the egg basket, then the grain and
water buckets. most of the eggs were in the chicken
house, because the door was closed at night, to
deter foxes and skunks who preyed on them, but some
broody hens would find places to nest and lay many
eggs - like under the corn crib - and i got the job
of crawling under in about a 2' high crawl space,
or into the straw loft above the hen house - dirt,
bugs, lice - gross! i'd run for a shower when i was
done - and frequently the eggs were rotten so we
got to bomb the hog yard with these odorous
missiles! also gross - paul hated sparrows and
pigeons, so we were encouraged and taught to
destroy their nests, eggs and nestlings! the hogs
loved them. the children took on tasks as they grew into
them - pitching hay from the loft, silage from the
silo (when you learned to respect the toxic gas it
gave off), milk cows, feed calves and horses, lead
the horses to the water tank, and be sure you
retied their tether rope correctly. it was a sexist household. paul did no house,
garden or chicken tasks, except to keep them in
good repair and plow as needed - corn and vine
crops were grown in the edge rows of a cornfield.
watermelons were secretly planted where an old
straw stack had been (great compost). milking was done by the children and the hired
hands, not by paul or mabel. paul considered it
'women's work' since he had so many sisters,
perhaps, or it was traditionally so, because the
men were kept so busy in the fields before tractors
and multi-row equipment. mabel didn't milk cows
until later years, when there were no hired hands
or children to do it. i was still at home, but she
gave me the housework and she milked, maybe for the
'quiet time' alone. there aren't many pictures of mabel in the 20's.
those must have been very busy years - the few
there are show her with children. she didn't have
many clothes, but by today's standards, that was
not unusual. social events were few and special -
family gatherings for summer picnics or christmas
reunion at the johnson farm. later years the
neighbor ladies created a 'birthday club' once a
month to celebrate - each lady getting a chance to
serve a nice afternoon 'coffee' and show off her
dishes and house. extra chairs were set around the
living room and dining room if necessary. the
daughters helped serve if they home. another social occasion was the quilting party -
just an afternoon of quilting around the big frame
set up over the dining room table, then coffee
breaks served with a nice cake, or for my mother,
pie because that was her specialty. mabel kept a very neat home. always cleaned up -
no litter, not many knick-knacks, decor nice but
simple, classics drapes, furniture, a few house
plants. even when she sewed it was cleaned up and
put away. i attribute this to personality, but also
necessity - that many people in the house left no
room for projects to be piled around. even in the
bedrooms we did not leave our clothes lying around.
paul had his closet upstairs, mabel kept her things
in the downstairs bedroom and its closet. a few
small dresser drawers kept her gloves,
handkerchiefs, lingerie and cosmetics -
unbelievable! she had a wooden jewelry box she kept
on the shelf in the closet - the amber beads, a
sliver parrot pin, her chain and watch from her 8th
grade graduation. i don't recall any rings except
her wedding ring (and a simple solitaire she
secured from the hard daily work). i think there
were pearls and a few simple earrings. mabel was thin, she told me, until her late
forties, so thin her clothes "hung" on her. she
appreciated pantsuits when they became the style -
end of corsets, slips, stockings, chilly
housedresses - but she never wore jeans, that was
farm work apparel. she had a coonskin coat in the
20's, a practical item, plus mink muff and fur
hats. later she used the muff to trim a cloth coat
and hat. (paul had coonskin coat too, i played with
them after they were worn and out of style). mabel was so organized - one had to be - there
was so much to do. but she took her afternoon nap -
to read the paper, a book, and then fall asleep
under the paper. she used the paper over her legs
in the summer to keep flies off. the house was
screened, but still a few flies got in - for a
while. she sewed, quilted, made carpet rags to take to
a weaver for rugs. later she did some embroidery,
but never knitted or crocheted. i think she
preferred to read or garden and by then after i was
away from home, she had the complete load of house,
chickens, cows and paul, and making sure farming
arrangements were completed. she kept the chickens
and cows for weekly money. and keeping up
correspondence weekly with her 6 children.
she belonged to a garden club, and specialized in
different plants over the years - irises, roses.
she also belonged to the gowrie women's club, and
presented book programs. and kept in touch with
relatives and lifelong friends. mabel and paul had
many friends in fort dodge, through politics and
paul's membership in the elks club. since they were not part of the religious
community, mabel and paul filled their lives with
family, building a beautiful prosperous farm,
politics and a different social life in fort dodge
with professional, educated people, and in des
moines when paul was state senator. mabel was able
to go to des moines with paul because they had a
wonderful, competent hired man and hired girl -
earl may and mildred milligan - who later left and
married. we children must have had the chance to go to
des moines because i can remember playing paper
dolls in the aisle of the senate chamer and staying
at the fort des moines hotel - the place to
stay in des moines. mabel had hard times/work dealing with the
deaths of all parents, some sisters, brothers,
while she had a young family to care for. in
addition to caring for everyone's health -
including the immigrant swede farmhand who was
gassed in world war I and returned to the farm
until he died; john's childhood foot injury, raging
poison intake and appendectomy; my knocked out
front teeth at the age of 4 from climbing; paul's
appendectomy, head injury from horses wild kicking;
having a son and two (future) son-in-laws in world
war II; measles, mumps, chicken pox, whooping
cough, cuts, infections; snow storms, mud roads,
rain, drought, and everyday hazards of farming. mabel did not look back - she did not talk about
her youth. she did not gossip, and cautioned us to
guard what we said in public on a personal level.
mabel that's why we talked more about worldly
affairs, not personalities. mabel did not lecture, tell us how to behave.
she taught by quiet example, gentle suggestion and
by being in control, but not controlling. there was
no "rebellion" because there was nothing to rebel
against. there were expectations unspoken -
reasonable, intelligent behavior assumed. an
inappropriate friend she gradually showed us the
light - how much did she worry, waiting for us to
understand? her own health - gall bladder, surgery,
appendectomy, ulcer, false teeth, but basically
long range good health, mental and physical.
i don't remember her ever losing her temper,
yelling, swearing or spanking. she had more children than anyone else in the
relations, but was an advocate of the margaret
sanger birth control movement (maybe that's where
my name came from!) irony! her only comment on my
large family - what a lot of work and
responsibility. she knew how to work, and how to rest. when doug arrived maybe a month early, when
hattie's cesarian scar ruptured, mom and ginny
wound up on the farm with jeff, amy, ellen, jd?,
and polly's four (because they were off to a
convention somewhere), and then the electric stove
and water heater quit, in mid august of course, and
hattie was in critical condition - but eventually
all recovered and doug was a very good baby! i went home after sui graduation, and that
summer signed a contract to teach in durant, $3,000
(1952). I stayed with dad (paul) so mom could go to
the national democratic convention in chicago,
maybe with almeda. mabel had become active in
democrat women's club, and was precinct committee
woman and county chair - she worked at the polls
sometimes. as paul retreated from life, mabel
quietly maintained her own. i'm sure it was her encouragement for us to
participate in school activities - journalism,
music, sports - to keep us busy, challenge our
talents, establish self-esteem for us not part of a
strictly religious milieu - to reinforce the
intellectual approach to life. |
